Hey! What do you think about the new digs? Fancy huh?! Don’t get to used to it because I won a free, yeah you read that right FREE, template from Free Fringes and with her help Blissville is going to be Swaaaanky. In the mean time here is Part 3 of I Am Not Crazy I Am Just Fat!
Last Thursday I got it in my head that I had to join Weight Watchers. The voices in my head were shouting, “RIGHT NOW!” So I did what I always do when the voices get loud, I hit a drive through for a number five with a large cola, no ice. However this time I didn’t order. I called Weight Watchers instead and signed up.
I was on a roll so drove to my local Weight Watchers center to weigh in and get some swag (because I heard you get lots of cool shit) but the commie bastards we closed! I sat in the truck raging against the weight loss machine (complete with defiant fist pumping.) I really wanted to get weighed in because I needed to know where I was starting and for whatever reason (I blame hormones)I needed to know right then. I thought about going to 24 Fitness around the block but the voices shouted, “Bitch is you CRAY-ZAY? That is a gym. We are not ready for a gym. They will look at you and make you buy shakes and bars! Try again.” My doctors office was a few miles away and they really dig me so I went there to get weighed.
I am really lucky my doctor likes me because I rolled up in there as if I had health insurance. I told the nurse about joining Weight Watchers and how I really needed to get weighed. I also told her that my PMS is a bitch and thought I needed some blood work. After they pulled my chart to make sure I wasn’t some nut she called me back to the office to get weighed. I have lost the same 30 pounds for the past few years so I had an idea but I wasn’t prepared for being so overweight that I could not be weighed by a standard doctors office scale. Yes, I can only be weighed by one of those Biggest Losers scales. (No witty aside. I would have cried had I not won my e-Bay auction for a scale I knew would hold me.)
Sigh? Yes. But don’t cry for me Argentina because I have a plan. I tried Weight Watchers last year and did it online. However I am a firm believer in If You Are Not Cheating You Are Not Trying so I would fudge my numbers to get more Points. (I know, I know, I am only cheating myself. Bite me.) This time around I am also doing the meetings. Did you know that they give you stuff when you hit your goals?! I saw stickers and keychains. I am going to lobby for tiaras!
Well that it’s for now. Oh wait I was supposed to tell you about how I ate half my points before noon. And I will just visit www.lexy.com and do a search for Tex In The City, badda boom-badda bing you get to hear me marvel at the amount of points in what I was calling The True Breakfast of Champions.
Hey, I may have a new blog home but the sign off is still the same!
Peace out, Party People and as always I wish you peace within.
Tex
I’m impressed with your initiative! Wish I had me some of that.
You did it, YAY!!! Congrats on getting the new blog going.
And weeee’re in this fight together! Battle of the Bulge, they call it. Dammit, I’m determined to conquer all!
Well well well……. someone has a new home!
I also need a new scale. I weighed myself 3 times today and got 3 different numbers… Worry not, Tex! You gonna be allllllll hot stuff on a platter!
Hey there! I have no idea what is going on with the comments and why they are not showing up but I wanted to THANK YOU ALL for stopping by and showing me some blog love!
Hula is the new holla,
Tex
TEX!!! Let me know if you need help! I’ve beat WP into some sort of submission over the last year !